Two rooms. One phone call.
Guard duty.
mainI’m on guard duty for my patutu tonight.
mainI put the speaker on charge the moment you said you were feeling sick
tumI can feel so many kisses through these love you
“So it’ll last the night.”
14 September · 00:17–00:24
I noticed.
“Bula lungi tab aa jaana?”
I asked if meetings needed cancelling. You thought I meant yours.
“Arey budhu bachcha meri”
“Sath rahu?”
You told me to work. I asked if you’d call without hesitating. You said you would.
14 September · 09:43“Idhar ki baarish udhar bhej deti hun”
tum · “Baarish bandh karwao”
main · “Aaj mushkil hai jaan”
At 11:39 you offered to send your rain here. At 18:12, I was telling you it was raining here too.
14 September · morning → evening“I like nuit more”
New bedsheets. Your perfume. One pillow under my head, the other in my arms.
main · “I like nuit on you”
You called me a ramen bowl. I told you about Little Things. You said you wanted to sleep.
14 September · 00:03, 00:46–00:51“Pyaar se bol dena”
tum · “Baby pyaar se bol dena🥹”
main · “Tum daro nai, secure raho, second guess na karo, and so on”
Cold soup, hot ice cream, tea with salt. I meant what I said about looking at you the same.
14 September · 19:19–19:29“Usko akkal aaye fir dikhanaaaaa”
main · “Max retires or not, I’m going to make our daughter sit and watch his quali of Jeddah 21”
tum · “Usko akkal aaye fir dikhanaaaaa. Pata chale paida hote hi dikha diye”
We already have parenting disagreements.
13 September · 13:55–13:57 · imagining her“Kya karega ye patutu”
main · “Maine ek patutu bana diya”
“Tum sogaye toh”
tum · “Patutu to bade kaam ki chiz hai”
You also agreed to hear the entire Ramayan from me. “Sun lungi pura acche se”
14 September · 18:04–18:15Good night,
Harshita.
— ShauryaMera bachcha, I liked being in your day today. Your call without asking first, you thinking of me every time you see a girl-dad reel, the very serious pineapple chocolate sandwich defence. I’m still thinking about all of it. And I’m happy you had those twenty minutes at aarti. I know how much you wanted to be there.
I wish I could do more of the actual holding. Matha pakad ke sula deta. You said my presence would be enough. I’d still put a 100, jaan. Until you were properly asleep. Deep sleep.
There’s a modak date pending. A whole week of Delhi you’ve asked for. And apparently a daughter whose racing education I’m not allowed to start at birth. Mamma first. Beti after. Me for both. I meant that.
Abhi, only pyaari. You don’t have to find the perfect words for any of this. Call if you need me, no asking first. I’ll be here when you wake up.
I love you, Harshita. I love you a lot.
A note on these moments
Our messages from 13–14 September. The drawings imagine the rooms and movements. The family, food date and being beside you are things we talked about wanting. The good-night note below is new.